Anecdotes for Lexie Rose

BY JONATHAN AND ESTHER POLLARD

Justice4JPnews Special Feature

July 3, 2009 - 11 Tammuz 5769 B"H

Special feature to mark the 4th anniversary of the passing of Rose Zeitz z"l.

Beloved mother and mother-in-law of Esther and Jonathan Pollard. Beloved
great grandmother of Lexie Rose.

INTRODUCTION - LEXIE ROSE'S GREAT UNCLE JONATHAN WRITES:

Dear Lexie Rose,

Welcome to the family! As the first great grandchild in our family, your
entry into the world this spring was an historic milestone!

In honor of your recent arrival, your great auntie Esther and I would like
to share some anecdotes with you today. Today, the 11th of Tammuz according
the Hebrew calendar, is a special day. It marks the 4th anniversary of the
departure of your great grandmother, Rose, for whom you are named.

Rose was a treasure to us all and we want you to know her too. These
anecdotes are about a quiet, soft-spoken, unassuming woman, who we believe,
lived a life of greatness and whose model left an indelible impression upon
us and upon everyone with whom she came in contact.

Because Rose meant so much to both of us, this document is a joint
initiative that your great auntie Esther and I undertook for you and for
Rose. To execute this project, we were faced with many challenges. I had to
do my part in the face of obvious limitations that prison life imposes upon
us and as a result, Auntie Esther had to work even harder for both of us.
How ever imperfect the final result may be, we hope it will be clear that we
put our hearts into it.

Your great grandmother, whom we will refer to simply as "Baube Rose", was
the living embodiment of unconditional love. She was one of those very rare
individuals who could always look past the circumstances or external
trappings in order to see right through to the heart of a person. She always
said quite simply, "People matter, things don't!"

Baube Rose was intuitive and insightful and could always be counted on for
the most down-to-earth advice. Even strangers continuously wanted to adopt
her as their grandmother and everyone would call her Baube Rose!

This was a woman who always saw the good in every situation and in every
person; who lived life fearlessly and always found a solution. I remember
when the bathroom ceiling in her duplex sprung multiple leaks and no matter
how many times the plumber and the plasterer came to fix it, it would soon
spring another leak. On one of these occasions, I asked her, what are you
going to do now?

"I'll fix it myself!" she declared.

"How can you do that?" I asked.

"I'll open an umbrella!" she replied.

And she did!

Baube Rose had a tremendous sense of humor and a keen sense of justice. For
example she once told me that you should never divide a chocolate cake
equally amongst your children. "Why not?" I asked. "Because not all of them
may like chocolate!" she replied.

She told me that when her own children were young, they would ask her, who
is your favorite child; which one do you love best? In response, she would
hold out her hand and spread her fingers wide and declare, "That's like
asking me which one of my fingers I love best! Is there one that is less
important than the others? Is there one that I can spare? Of course not! I
love them all!"

We have chosen a few of our favorite anecdotes to share with you about Baube
Rose and the stories follow below. In the first episode, you will learn
about your great grandmother's reaction to a gift she received and how she
treasured it forever, in spite of what it looked like! In the next story,
Baube Rose uses an old umbrella to teach us all the meaning of chessed (acts
of loving-kindness); and in the final anecdote Baube Rose teaches us about
the true meaning of hachnassat orchim (home hospitality). We chose these
anecdotes just to whet your appetite to learn more about this remarkable
woman, your great grandmother, your Baube Rose!

I took my turn by writing this introductory note; now it is your great
auntie Esther's turn to tell a story. I will continue where she leaves off.
Enjoy!

With love,

Your Great Uncle Jonathan

PART I - LEXIE ROSE'S GREAT AUNTIE ESTHER WRITES:

This is a story about a white elephant and about your great grandmother,
Baube Rose, whose real name was Rose Bernice Caron. When she married your
great grandfather, she took the family name Zeitz (just like yours!) Today,
we pray for her soul using her Jewish name, Rayzl Bracha bat Lipa.

Forgive me Lexie Rose, if the way I write is a little more than you can
handle at this time, but we hope that our stories will stay with you for a
long, long time, just like the ring that your great grandmother and great
grandfather gave me for my 16th birthday.

At my parents' request, on the eve of my 16th birthday, I travelled downtown
to choose my birthday gift from the big tray of rings that our cousin (the
jeweler) had set down in front of me. Beaming and overjoyed, I brought the
ring of my choice home for my parents' approval and they rejected it out of
hand!

Baube Rose declared, "This ring is absolutely not suitable for a child of
16! It is meant for a grown woman, not for a child of 16!"

I was devastated! It was a beautiful ring! It had 19 small sapphires in a
tiered, ribbon-like, perfectly symmetrical design and it was EXACTLY what I
wanted! I begged and pleaded with my parents to be allowed to keep it.

I guess that I was so insistent that Baube Rose agreed to give the matter a
little more thought. To her great credit, after thinking it over, she
realized I won't always be16 years old and that in time, I would grow into
it. So she relented and I was allowed to keep the ring of my choice,
provided that I promised to wear it only on special occasions (with her
permission, of course) until I would be grown up. Time goes by so quickly -
as we all discovered - indeed, so quickly that I don't remember ever having
to ask permission to wear it. I still have the ring after all these years
and I still love it!

So it is with these anecdotes that great uncle Jonathan and I are assembling
for you. Time passes quickly. By the time you are old enough to really want
to know about the great grandmother you are named for, G-d willing, you will
be old enough to read the stories and understand them too. So without any
further delay, let's get started:

As I mentioned, this first story is about an elephant. It is a true story.
If you don't believe me, you can ask your great auntie Laura, or our
brothers, Steven and Michael (your great uncles) or our oldest brother,
Marvin (who is your grandfather!) Your great uncle Jonathan loves this
story and has heard it countless times. Everyone in our family knows this
story. Not everyone can recall exactly how it began, but they all know how
it ended.

This story begins in the city of Montreal, where the elephant was bought
some time well before my 8th birthday. How do I know how to date it? Because
our family moved from Montreal to the suburbs when I was 7 ½ years old and
the elephant moved with us.

Now, this was not just any old elephant! This was a dazzling, shiny,
white-glazed porcelain elephant, replete with ivory tusks, standing about 6
inches tall. I first saw the elephant in the local Kressge's storefront
window, in the Van Horne Shopping Center in mid-town Montreal. I thought
this elephant figurine was just the most beautiful thing I had ever seen!
Sunlight streaming through the window acted like a prism, casting colorful
rainbows on the elephant's glazed porcelain finish. I was thoroughly
enchanted by its trumpeting trunk and billowing ears, shiny white glaze, and
all the colorful rainbows dancing on its hide!

From the first time I laid eyes on it, I knew that I wanted this china
elephant as a gift for my mother, your great grandmother, Baube Rose. I knew
that she too would love it just as much as I did, maybe even more.

The price was clearly marked on a card in the window, right next to the
elephant. It was rather steep for a child of six or seven: 98 cents! This
was a veritable fortune in a day and age when a dollar might be a
substantial part of the grocery money for the week. But at that tender age,
I was undaunted by the price and determined that I would save every penny I
got until I had enough money to buy the elephant for my mother.

I immediately undertook an austerity budget. Over the next weeks and months,
instead of buying penny candy or ice cream when we kids were given the money
for a treat, I saved my pennies and dropped them into a little glass Gerber
baby food jar with a slot punched in the lid. Every now and then, when we
got a few pennies for allowance, the pennies went into the savings jar as
well.

I counted and recounted my pennies. For a long time there always seemed to
be such a long way to go to reach the sum of 98 cents. I don't recall now
how long it took, - it has been so many years - but while my penny pile was
growing, every now and then I would walk past Kressge's display window to
visit the white elephant and I would dream of the day that I would finally
be able to buy it and bring it home.

Finally the great day came! Total penny count: exactly 98 cents!

I remember that this was my "secret mission" to go and buy the elephant for
Baube Rose. I did not ask for permission to go the shopping center and I
certainly did not tell anyone that I was going to Kressge's. How I got away
with that, at my young age, I really don't recall. Perhaps it was on the way
home from school that I carried out my "secret mission" so no one had the
opportunity to realize that I was gone.

I vividly remember pushing the glass door of Kressge's open and walking into
the store, clutching my 98 cents. I remember pointing to the desired item
and the saleslady taking, what I thought was a breath-takingly beautiful
white elephant, out of the window for me. I handed her the money and got the
shock of my life, when the saleslady informed me that it wasn't enough!

I protested, "But that can't be! The elephant costs 98 cents and I just gave
you 98 cents!"

The saleslady just frowned.

"I counted it and counted it and counted it," I insisted, "and it always
came out to 98 cents!"

"Now see here, little girl," said the saleslady, "you are correct, you did
give me 98 cents and that is the price of the elephant, but my dear, there
is also provincial sales tax, and that brings the price of your purchase up
to one dollar and two cents. I am sorry but I have to charge you the sales
tax. Do you have any more money in your pocket?"

I slowly shook my head from side to side, my eyes very wide, "No, I don't
have any more money at all. This is all the money I have!"

I was ready to cry. I bit my lip, to hold back the tears, I'm a big girl and
I don't cry. But what is this "sales tacks" stuff? I had never heard of
"sales tacks" before! It seemed totally unfair to tack on "sales tacks" to
the price. like someone was trying to fool you on purpose, saying one price
and then when you want to buy, changing the price!

"Where is your mother?" the saleslady asked in a kind voice. "Perhaps she
can help you out with the extra change. Is your mother outside? Can you go
and get her?"

Again I shook my head, "No, my mother is not outside! And my mother can't
help me! She doesn't even know I am here now!"

Wary now, the saleslady demanded, "What do you mean, your mother doesn't
know you are here?!"

"This is supposed to be a surprise!" I blurted out. "This elephant is a
surprise for my mother! I saved all of my money for soooo long to buy it for
her as a surprise!"

The kindly saleslady smiled. She seemed relieved and was apparently touched
by my deep desire to buy this elephant for my mother and to surprise her.
She stepped into the rescue, right in the nick of time.

"Well," she said, "I am not sure if there is "sales tacks" on a surprise
that is bought for a mother, so let's not worry about it. The 98 cents is
fine. The elephant is yours. Would you like me to wrap it for your mother?"

Words cannot describe the contentment and the joy I felt as I walked out of
Kressge's, hugging the purple-blue cardboard gift box stuffed with tissue
paper which cradled the white porcelain elephant inside.

I marched home, triumphant! Just as soon as I got in the door, I handed the
square purple-blue gift box to my mother, your great grandmother Baube Rose,
who was, indeed, very surprised!

It wasn't her birthday. It wasn't mother's day. It was just a surprise for a
beloved mother on an ordinary day - a beautiful white elephant, with
rainbows dancing on his hide and long, lovely white tusks.

Baube Rose loved the elephant! Just as I had thought, she loved it as much
as I did, and maybe more! I knew then and there that it had been worth all
the saving and waiting and even the problem with "sales tacks!"

I know, Lexie Rose, you think that that is where the story ends. But no, it
continues. It continues for years and years.

For as many years as I can remember, Baube Rose cherished that little white
elephant and accorded it the kind of respect and a place of honor usually
reserved for the 'pedigrees' made of fine bone china and boasting names like
Lladro or Royal Doulton (which she also owned.) Baube Rose treated her 98
cent Kressge's elephant like royalty! I always knew, as I was growing up,
that she treated it that way because it was a gift and because I gave it to
her, and because loving the elephant was like loving me and Baube Rose loved
all of her children. These words were never spoken. In fact, Baube Rose was
not much one for verbal displays of affection, but her actions always spoke
much louder than words.

The white elephant story takes a tragic turn sometime down the road.

For years and years that white elephant lived in honor in our home. And
everyone knew that Baube Rose loved it. Perhaps it is because she loved it
so much that the poor little creature one day became a target of someone's
temper tantrum or was it a fit of pique. I was not home at the time. Indeed,
by that time I no longer lived at home any more. But I do remember coming
home to visit sometime after "the tragedy" and finding the broken pieces.
The precious white china elephant had been completely shattered!

When I confronted my mother after discovering the broken pieces of her
treasured white elephant, Baube Rose was very sad about it. She never blamed
anyone. Never accused anyone. Never ever said who did it, though I did ask.
She was not one to point a finger, to tale-bear or to blame. She also was
never one to hold a grudge. In fact, I might never even have known about the
"tragedy" had I not had reason to search for some other lost item in Baube
Rose's dresser.

I found the broken pieces of her white elephant in the drawer of Baube Rose's
dressing table. Most people, confronted with a shattered piece of china
would throw it in the garbage, but not Baube Rose. There were too many
memories and too much love attached to this gift; Baube Rose was not going
to simply trash it. Although useless as a decoration and no longer
beautiful, Baube Rose would never stop loving the little elephant. So she
gathered up all the pieces of the elephant into a hanky and tucked it away
in the drawer. That is where I eventually found it with all the pieces
lovingly wrapped in a hanky.

That little white Kressge's elephant, smashed to pieces, remained in her
drawer for years and years and years. So many years, that the pieces were
still in the drawer when Baube Rose's youngest child got married and moved
out of the house.

The pieces remained there for as long as Baube Rose lived in the house. They
were discarded only when we closed down the house years later, after Baube
Rose's health forced her to move to a more supportive environment.

That is how Baube Rose taught all of us, but especially me, the biggest
lessons about life and love and about gift giving, gratitude, appreciation,
acceptance and forgiving and so much more -- not by what she said about this
little white elephant but by what she did.

If you read this story again - a few times - and think about it, you will
find that Baube Rose is still teaching us through her actions, through the
memories she left behind, and even through the shards of a 98 cent white
porcelain elephant, lovingly cherished, long after it had no useful function
and certainly no beautiful form. If you think about it, Lexie Rose, now
Baube Rose is teaching you!

PART II - LEXIE ROSE'S GREAT UNCLE JONATHAN WRITES:

Lexie Rose, did you like that story? The white elephant is one of my
favorites. I have fun imagining your great auntie Esther as a little kid and
I like to imagine how she looked when she discovered sales "tacks". I wish
that they had not gotten rid of the pieces of that white elephant. I think
you and I would have both liked to see them.

You know Lexie Rose, you might be thinking to yourself that it was easy for
your great grandmother to keep all the broken pieces of the elephant, after
all they were hidden in a drawer and no one else saw them, so who cares if
the elephant was ugly once it was all busted up. But that, my young friend,
is the whole point. Baube Rose did not care what others thought. She did not
keep the pieces because it mattered to anyone else. She kept them because
the little white elephant was so precious to her. She did not think about
the impression that this act of hers (saving the pieces) would make on her
own children, or her grandchildren, or even on you someday. She just did it
because she so valued the love that the little elephant represented and that
is what made it precious, no matter what it looked like.

So now you may be thinking, okay, so she kept a broken china elephant. So
what?

And I will answer you.

Your great grandmother, Baube Rose, showed just as much kindness to living
beings as she did to an inanimate object like that elephant. Did your
grandfather, Marvin, ever tell you about his three-legged dog, Junior? Yes,
the one that bit him on the thumb! No, it wasn't the dog's fault. Marvin
tried to break up a dog fight between Junior and your Grandmother Debbie's
childhood dog, Roggie, and ended up with a bit thumb! Your great auntie
Esther told me how Junior was so mortified when Marvin yelped in pain and
Junior realized he had bitten his own master that he walked all the way home
with his head down and tail tucked between his legs. Once they got home,
Junior did not stop kissing and licking your grandfather, trying to
apologize. The point is, Lexie Rose, your grandfather's childhood three -
legged dog did not always have three legs. It started out with four. Run
over by a motorcycle and dragged until his right front leg was shredded,
Junior was an amputee at the ripe old age of 8.

Marvin's mother, your great grandmother, Baube Rose, was advised by a couple
of well-meaning busybodies (friends of hers) that her 3 legged dog looks
"hideous". That she should get rid of it. Destroy it. Put it to sleep. Who
wants to look at a deformed and ugly creature that has 3 legs, they said.
But your Baube Rose did not see a deformed, ugly creature. She saw Junior,
the family dog, in pain and with only 3 legs. It never dawned on her to get
rid of him! With patience and with love, she kept him and Junior lived and
loved for another 5 years, with 3 legs and a whole heart!

Or did your father ever tell you about Junior's successor, Rex? Rex was a
nervous wreck of a dog that your great uncle Michael brought home just
before he moved out of Baube Rose's house. Michael moved out, but Rex
remained. Rex was very cute and very loving, but deadly when it came to
personal property. Any time Baube Rose left him alone in the house, Rex
would get scared. To calm himself down, he chewed things. Rex chewed the
wall paper off the walls. He chewed her clothes in the laundry basket. Rex
chewed at the insoles of Baube Rose's shoes until they were in shreds - only
the good leather ones, mind you. Baube Rose used to joke that his name was
'Rex' because he 'wrecks' things. Think about it, Lexie Rose, would anyone
but Baube Rose have kept this loveable nervous wreck of a dog in their house
for more than 15 minutes?! Rex lived with Baube Rose for the better part of
a decade! Baube Rose never saw the bad in him, only the good.

But really, it is this next anecdote about an umbrella that makes the point.
Baube Rose was as loving and kind towards broken people as she was towards
broken animals and other shattered memorabilia.

Here is the anecdote about an umbrella.

All of her life, your great grandmother, Baube Rose was a baalat chessed -
someone who loves to help other people. When her children were young, she
volunteered part of her time to help others. When all of her children were
grown and out of the house, she volunteered most of her time in order to
help others.

Baube Rose lived in Chomedey, a suburb of Montreal. Much of her volunteer
work centered upon the Jewish Rehabilitation Hospital in Chomedey, or "the
Rehab" as it was called. I never knew if she was the head of the women's
auxiliary at the Rehab or if she just did all the work. Baube Rose was
always at the Rehab. I would call on the phone and she would always be just
coming from or just going to the Rehab. Running "Meals -on-Wheels" for the
elderly and the infirm. Running the hospital's boutique to raise funds.
Ensuring that patients and visitors would have whatever they needed at this
isolated location. Greeting new patients with "care packages". Doing
programming. Chairing meetings. Running errands. Whatever needed to be done
at the Rehab, everyone knew that Baube Rose would do it, run it, manage it,
fix it, supervise it, and improve it! Baube Rose often told me how hard she
and a small group of dedicated volunteers were working to keep the Jewish
Rehabilitation hospital Jewish in more than name alone. More than anything
else, she wanted the hospital to remain a place where Jews could get the
care that they needed in a kosher Jewish environment.

The story about the umbrella happened at the Rehab. Here is how it goes:

It was a rainy day. Baube Rose was on her way to a meeting at the Rehab
Hospital wearing a warm jacket and carrying a nice large umbrella to shield
her from the rain and the wind. One of the other volunteers was picking her
up by car, but the umbrella would still be very useful just walking from the
car to the hospital and from the hospital back to the car.

At the hospital, Baube Rose attended her planning meeting and put in some
time assisting new patients. By late afternoon, she had put in a full day
and was looking forward to going home. Her friend, the driver, told Baube
Rose that she would get the car and bring it round to the front entrance, to
just wait for her there. Baube Rose put on her warm jacket and took her
umbrella and headed to the front entrance. As she was walking across the
hall towards the door, an elderly lady blocked her path and grabbed for
Baube Rose's umbrella.

The elderly lady began to pull at the umbrella, insisting in great
agitation, over and over again: "My umbrella! My umbrella!"

Baube Rose was taken by surprise and for a second or two participated in
this tug of war over the umbrella. That just made the elderly lady tug
harder while insisting loudly over and over again, "My umbrella!"

"Did you know this woman?" I asked Baube Rose, when she related this story.

"No, I had never seen her before."

"So what did you do?" I asked.

"I let go of the umbrella." said Baube Rose.

"Then what?" I asked.

"Then she took it and I left." replied Baube Rose.

"But it was your umbrella!" countered your great auntie Esther.

"Yes, I know," said Baube Rose.

"So why did you give it to her?"

"Because she needed it more than I did."

"But, don't you want it back?" asked Great Auntie Esther.

"No. I have others." your great grandmother responded.

And that was the end of the story!

Lexie Rose, would you give up your umbrella, or your coat, or your blanket,
or your schoolbag or your favorite toy, just because someone else needs it
more? Would you have the wisdom to quickly size up the situation, as your
great grandmother did in seconds, and to understand that true chessed means
giving to a person in need, what they need and when they need it, without
question or reservation or hesitation. Baube Rose was like that. She knew
instantly that she was dealing with a broken human being. She understood
that to heal the person, she ought not to argue, but instead to step into
their reality and share it with them. She did that for this elderly lady and
gave up her own umbrella in the process. A small price, she would say, to
heal another human being, even if only momentarily.

And now it is Great Auntie Esther's turn again.

PART III - LEXIE ROSE'S GREAT AUNTIE ESTHER WRITES:

Great Uncle Jonathan's story reminds me of the story of Mr. Barvaz. I don't
know where

Mr. Barvaz is today, but perhaps once this story is told, your parents or
maybe your grandparents will be able to locate him for you.

Your great grandmother, Baube Rose, was not only a baalat chessed, she also
excelled at the mitzvah of hachnassat orchim. Hachnassat orchim is the
mitzvah of having guests. Lots of people do it. Few really know the real
meaning of this mitzvah, or how to do it with a full heart. But your great
grandmother did!

Entertaining guests, having guests, having people sleep over, or inviting
company for Shabbat is very nice. But it is not true hachnassat orchim. Not
if the people you invite have some other place to stay, or some other place
to eat, and you are inviting them because you enjoy having them or they
enjoying staying by you. True hachnassat orchim means taking in people who
need a place to stay, who have no where else to go, who need the meal that
you share with them. Many people today have large homes and full
refrigerators but they don't have room for guests. Unless of course, you
make an appointment and come on Sunday between 12 and 2 and leave promptly
after the coffee and cake is served.

Your great grandmother had a small house and not a lot of money, but she
always had room for guests and whatever food was in the refrigerator was
always shared with anyone who was hungry. As children, we never had to ask
permission in advance if we wanted to ask a friend to stay for supper. Baube
Rose always said yes and whatever was in the pot, she just divided it up so
that everyone got some. Similarly, people who needed a place to stay
overnight always knew that they could count on her. Sometimes guests would
come and there really was no room, but they could never tell. Like the time
an entire family came from Israel and stayed for more than a week and she
gave away her own bed and slept sitting up in a chair (your great
grandfather was working the nightshift) and no one knew where she was
sleeping or if she was sleeping at all.

When we no longer lived in Montreal, if any of our friends would come from
the States or from Israel and needed a place to stay in Montreal, even
though we were not there, your great grandmother immediately opened her home
and heart and took them in. As she was getting on in years and her health
was failing, it was harder and harder for her to do the mitzvah of
hachnassat orchim, but she still never refused. And that brings us to the
story of Mr. Barvaz.

It was somewhere in the late 1990's. I was in Israel taking care of business
for great uncle Jonathan. On my way back to North Carolina, I planned to
travel via Montreal to see Baube Rose. Before boarding the plane at Ben
Gurion Airport, I went to the duty free shop to buy a gift for Baube Rose.
In those days every duty free shop had its own impressive display case filed
with Swarovski crystal, the finest Austrian crystal. I chose a most
adorable-looking Swarovski crystal duck for Baube Rose - one that I knew she
didn't have. She loved to collect Swarovski animals and this duck would be
the perfect addition to her collection.

Before boarding, I called Montreal just to let Baube Rose know that all is
well and that the plane is on time and I will see her tomorrow (B"H). My
sister, your great auntie Laura, was visiting with Baube Rose when I called
and she happened to overhear the conversation. Among other things, I told
Baube Rose that a friend of ours needs a place to stay in Montreal and we
wondering if she would host him when he arrives. "His name," I told her, "is
Mr. Barvaz, and he is a lovely guy, no trouble at all. Doesn't eat much,
just needs a place to stay", and can he stay with her? "Yes, of course!" she
said, "No problem! Just let me know when he is coming and we will be happy
to have him!"

Overhearing the conversation, Great Auntie Laura took the phone from Baube
Rose and took me to task very soundly - and rightly so! "How can you do
this?!" she demanded. "How can you impose on our mother this way? You know
she is not well. You know it will be hard for her to look after a guest! Why
are you always sending guests to her?!"

I told your great auntie not to worry, that Mr. Barvaz was special and
different and that Baube Rose would not be in the least bit taxed by him,
but Great Auntie Laura was not convinced. We agreed to leave the discussion
for later in Montreal. We said goodbye amiably and she wished me a good,
safe trip.

Have you guessed the punch line yet, Lexie Rose? Neither did Baube Rose or
Great Auntie Laura, until I showed up in Montreal. As soon as I arrived at
Baube Rose's house and we hugged and kissed and greeted each other, I pulled
a beautiful gift box out of my bag and handed it to Baube Rose.

"Mom," I said, "I would like you to meet Mr. Barvaz!"

Baube Rose looked at me quizzically, as if to say, where is he?

"This," I said, pointing to the Swarovski crystal box, "is Mr. Barvaz!"

Baube Rose opened the box and had a look at the lovely crystal duck as I
quickly added, "Mom, in Hebrew, the word 'barvaz' means 'duck'! This is Mr.
Barvaz! Mr. Barvaz not only needs a place to stay, but he would like to live
with you forever! Is that okay?"

We all had a good laugh, Great Auntie Laura, Baube Rose and me!

I don't know what happened to Mr. Barvaz, the Swarovski crystal duck. As
Baube Rose was winding down her time on earth, she often gave away the
things she loved to the ones she loved. She said she wanted to see her loved
ones enjoy these things in her lifetime. Is Mr. Barvaz at your house? Did
Baube Rose give him to your father? Or perhaps Mr. Barvaz is at your
Grandmother Debbie's house? Or maybe at one of your great uncles homes? You
can ask them. Or maybe just check out the china cabinet the next time you
visit. Now that you know who Mr. Barvaz is, you will know where to find him.
And you will also know about the great grandmother for whom you are named,
who always opened her home and her heart to anyone who needed a meal or a
place to stay -even if it turned out to be a duck!

Now back to your great uncle Jonathan.

PART IV - LEXIE ROSE'S GREAT UNCLE JONATHAN WRITES:

Lexie Rose, we hope you are starting to see a picture of your great
grandmother, your namesake, as a person, not just as a concept or a shadowy
stranger.

Our sages say that Jewish greatness and strength of character are most
obviously revealed, not in public circumstances or in heroic
once-in-a-lifetime actions, but by the small, mundane matters that make up
every day life --- especially in the way a person interacts with his family
and his loved ones, behind closed doors, when no one is looking. It is in
the home, in daily actions and reactions, that is where true greatness will
be seen. This is the opposite of the Hollywood stereotype or the Washington
stereotype, where people who are adulated publicly often turn out to be
simply intolerable at home and beastly towards their loved ones.

What distinguished your great grandmother, more than anything else, was her
ability to connect with all people. Baube Rose could put anyone at ease. She
could talk to anyone. She could get along with anyone. When she attended
Bnai Brith out-of-town conventions or other women's events, she was always
asked to room with the women no one else wanted as roommates. And these
women always became her friends!

Everybody loved Rose, and I did too. Every year on December 28th, I made a
special point of calling Rose to thank her. These calls were a ritual we had
and she would wait for my call. You see, Lexie Rose, December 28th is your
great auntie Esther's birthday. That is why I would call your great
grandmother to thank her for giving birth to my wife and for raising her to
be such a wonderful person. Baube Rose always chuckled and said something
very simple in response. "You're welcome!" she would say, "it was a
pleasure!"

I look at my wife, your great auntie Esther, and I see in her the
realization of an old saying, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree."
All of the qualities that I so admired in your great grandmother are there
in my wife and in Baube Rose's children and grandchildren. If you want to
know who Baube Rose was, all you have to do is to delve into the legacy of
love she left behind.

Lexie Rose, we hope to continue with more anecdotes for you some other time.
We hope that for now these stories will introduce you to a great grandmother
who was a pleasure to know and a delight to learn from. Just as one candle
lights another without diminishing its own flame at all, one soul lights
another soul without being diminished at all. We see in you a spark of the
soul of your great grandmother, Rose, and we are delighted to have that
spark back with us here on Earth! May G-d bless you, Lexie Rose, and may you
grow to be a credit to her name! May these words that we have written and
shared with you today be an elevation for the holy soul of your great
grandmother and our beloved mother, Rayzl Bracha bat Lipa, (Rose Bernice
Caron Zeitz). On this, the 4th anniversary of her passing, we respectfully
conclude with two short prayers from our liturgy:

"The candle of HaShem is the soul of man"

There in Gan Edan may our beloved Rayzl Bracha bat Lipa dwell,

In the lofty heights with the holy and the pure, the righteous and the
pious,

Bound in the Bond of Eternal Life.

There, may her holy shadow rest close to HaShem, beneath the Tree of Life.

Behold, in her lifetime she desired only our good,

And in her death may she not forget us in the Eternal Life.

May her merit shield us before You, exalted and uplifted G-d,

That You should transform our mourning to joy and uplift our radiance
forever.

Bless us with all blessings, success, goodness and life,

And comfort us with the consolation of Zion.

May her earthly remains repose in their resting place

And may she rise to her portion at the end of days. Amain!

O G-d Full of Mercy, Who dwells on high, grant proper rest on the wings of
the Divine Presence

In the lofty levels of the holy and the pure ones, who shine like the glow
of the firmament

For the soul of Rayzl Bracha bat Lipa who went on to her world,

Because people are contributing to charity in the memory of her soul.

May her resting place be in the Garden of Eden

Therefore may the Master of Mercy shelter her in the shelter of His wings
for eternity;

And may He bind her soul in the Bond of Life.

HaShem is her heritage and may she repose in peace on her resting place.

Now let us respond: Amain!

We hope, dear Lexie Rose that this will someday be as meaningful you to
read, as it has been for us to write. We are sending it to you now via your
parents. In future, if you ever need to find a copy on your own, it will be
waiting for you on the web.

With much love and blessing,

Your great uncle Jonathan and great auntie Esther

PS Lexie Rose, you may also take pleasure learning about your great
grandmother by reading the original hesped that we wrote for her when she
left the world, "A Rose in the Garden of Eden" You will find it at:
www.jonathanpollard.org/2005/072105.htm

Bracha v' hatzlacha!